Other Caithness Poets

Caithness Dialect Dictionary

Ted an' Coomy
by WT Lyall

We wance hed two famous musicians
Though neither hed musical degree
Weel known as ai never die buskers
Ted ai Banjo an' Coomy MacPhee.

Ted's banjo wis no stradivarious
A two stringed all metal device
If ye looked at ai neime o' ai maker
A vintage McVitie an' Price.

Coomy's bagpipes hed seen loyal service
At Culloden wi' ai rest o' ai macs,
When Coomy stepped oot doon ai High Street
Ai noise wis lek twelve skalded cats.

Ai most popular stance wis ai pictures
Ai Pavilion an' Breadalbane hall
We's well entertained when we stood in ai queue
When Coomy or Ted gave thur all.

When wan made a noise at ai Breadalbane
At ai Pavilion ai ither wid whine
They never of course played agither
They's bad enough wan at a time

They wid trechle ai streets o' ai backside
An' ai weekside, till see fit they'd get
Then knock at yur door for twa coppers
Wi' a dirty black greasy ould kep.

Ades Coomy 'at reiched oot for stardom
"Piper wan choon" wis first till play mime
He starred in ai famed "Silver Darlings"
Then ai star saw himsel seven times.

But gone are ai days o' 'iss buskers
A penny in ai hat wis thur fee
They were cheip entertainment for many
Ted ai Banjo an' Coomy MacPhee.